Yes, for some odd reason there are people out there that might not want to see Gainax. Maybe they’re somehow mentally deficient, or they have some sort of chemical imbalance that makes them stupid, sometimes you can never tell. Here are some of the tricks of the trade to get this small minority of people to watch the best anime there is. And remember, if this doesn’t work, kill them to take them out of their misery; its the only way. Your doing them a favor.

* Duct tapes works for most things, tape them down, use small strips to keep their eyes open, and loop the part of Eva where Asaka is screaming to the music of “Ode To Joy”.

* If that doesn’t work, don’t forget WD-40. It works on most things that duct tape won’t.

* Remember, roofies aren’t just for date rape, drop them in an unsuspecting anime fan’s Coke (if they drink Pepsi, kill them), and when they come to, have Gunbusters playing. And while their out of it, you might as well take their kidneys to sell on the black market. A kidney will buy a whole lot of Eva wall scrolls.

* To fool all the annoying DBZ heads, first say that your going to have a giant Seian feast, filled with all the movies and pushups. Then kill them all. We have no need for their kind.

* To convert the Gundam fans, slip in late at night and replace all their Gundam Wing DVDs with Eva, and all their MS Team with Royal Air Force. See how long it takes for them to notice.

* Never forget the usefulness of a tranquilizer gun, the femric artery is the best place to place your shot for maximum tranquilizer exchange. Then, after you force them to watch Otaku no Video and Mahromatic, tag them and release them back into their native habitat.

* I hear that most people will do just about anything to save their mother from a flame thrower, try using one of those.

* Though Chloroform is a carcinogenic, the joy of knowing Gainax is far greater then the pain of nose cancer, don't be afraid to use the entire bottle.

* Offer free pie (or if your in the big city, heroin), and when the unsuspecting Otaku come running at the thought of free food, lock them in a room with Furi Kuri playing on four TV's until they pass out from insanity.